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Saturday, January 4, 2014

10 Best Movies of 2013 That I Saw

I love reading "best of" lists at the end of the year. What I don't like, are the best movie lists. Because 99% of them are written by the crazy film crowd who watch EVERYTHING. See, there are normal people, who only see the hit movies that go to theaters. There are the crazy film people, who watch every single thing that comes along. Then there are the other people, who only put those weird obscure movies on their "best of" lists so they can seem hip and look like they know a thing or two about movies.

As for me, I fall in the middle. In my younger years I watched everything I could get my hands on, but as a grown up, ugh, I have less time for movies. So I don't see all those weird movies that no one has ever heard of but seems to be THE BEST ONES OF 2013! Unlike most movie goes, and film reviewers these days, I go to the movies for one purpose, and one purpose only. To shut my mind off and just be entertained. I don't go to movies so I can go home and bitch about the lighting, or the camera work, or the directors choices. I just want a fun movie that can keep me entertained. So that should give you an idea of how this list is going to go. Example: Gravity will not be on it. It wouldn't even make the top 20, 30, or 50. It wasn't that great. People are going nuts over how amazing it is. It was Sandra Bullock floating in CGI space for almost 2 hours. Woo. Everyone is losing it over the long opening shot, that was CGI. It's easy as hell to make one long continuous shot if you're using CGI. Tarantino uses actual sets, and people. Not CGI with faces copied and pasted on bodies. BORING.

So this is my list of the best movies, that I saw, in 2013. Granted, I haven't seen everything, so don't lose your mind because I left Her, or Wolf Of Wall Street off. Read the title of the post. Get it? OK, here we go....

10. Pain & Gain
After watching this movie, I had no idea what in the hell just happened to me. It was all kinds of weird, but in a great way.

9. You're Next
This movie grew on me over time. It was marketed and sold on TV so insanely wrong. At glance, it's the typical crazy people trying to get into the house to kill people horror movie. But what is it? Take Home Alone, and turn it into a slasher movie. Seriously. I don't even want to post a clip because there are so many surprises and great moments I want nothing ruined. If you like horror in the least bit, watch this movie.

8. Man of Steel
Some loved this. Some hated this. Some cry and whine about how Superman was destroying all the buildings in the big fight scene. Well what did you want him to do? "Uh Hey Zod, is it cool if we take this fight to the middle of nowhere so none of these buildings get wrecked?" Seriously people. And stop with the whole "Superman doesn't kill!" Yes he does. Yes he has. Zod in previous movies and in comics. And he even kills the Joker in a video game cut scene. So shut up.

7. This is the End
This was a good year for comedy movies. Bad Grandpa and Anchorman 2 were both great. But This is the End has to take the title for the best comedy of 2013 for this scene down here alone.

6. Thor: The Dark World
Let's all be honest. The reason why this movie was so great was for one reason, and one reason only. LOKI!

5. The World's End
This movie is kind of a cheat. I am a HUGE fan of Edgar, Simon, and Nick. So even if this movie turned out to be garbage, it would still end up on this list. Thankfully it's not garbage, it's great. It wasn't as funny as I was expecting it to be, but that's OK. It wasn't meant to be a comedy. Even though it had it's moments.

4. A Band Called Death 
Yep, time to put a documentary up here. Had a lot of good ones this year but shove your Blackfish up your butt I still plan to go to Sea World so my kids can be amazed and blown away by awesome tricks by Shamu. A Band Called Death is a pretty amazing story that shows the power of music and the internet. Death was a band way back in the 70s who never went anywhere, until 30 years later when their music that was dug up at a record store went viral. It's a great doc, but also great because the music is also amazing. I can't count the times I listened to their record after seeing this movie.

3. Evil Dead
Yeah, Evil Dead. At number 3. I haven't seen this on any top lists of the year which is a shame. It's really the best horror movie of the year. I have been an Evil Dead fan since I was a kid and my older brother made me watch the original. I grew up idolizing Bruce Campbell and Sam Raimi. When word of a remake hit, I was furious like most. Then the trailer came along and then I saw the movie and was blown away. It was fantastic.

2. The Hobbit: The Desolation of Smaug
I liked the first Hobbit movie that came out last year. But I LOVED this one. What will it take to get Peter Jackson to make a Legend of Zelda movie already??

1. Pacific Rim
TODAY, WE ARE CANCELLING THE APOCALYPSE! This is by far, the most fun I have had in the movies in years. YEARS. This was a movie that did everything I hope from movies. To mesmerize me, make me geek out, and make me feel like a kid again. To bring back that magic. Some people loved it, and some people hated it. But who cares. This was a movie about giant robots fighting giant monsters. If you went into the movie wanting more than that, that's your own fault. I love, love, LOVE this movie. I saw it in theaters 3 times. And I think I have watched it at home at least 12 times by now. I can't get enough of it. I mean the score was done by the guy who does the music for Game of Thrones and Tom Morello from Rage Against The Machine! Enough said!